Review: Lynn's Paradise Cafe

An assortment of breakfast items at Lynn's. (Credit: Chris Hall)

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Since 1995, European teams have decisively ruled the Ryder Cup, winning five of the last six contests — the last two meetings by solid nine-stroke spreads. Even someone like me who can barely tell a birdie from a dogleg knows that ain’t good.

Word has it that Paul Azinger, captain of the U.S. team, has personally clipped every blade of Valhalla’s course to ensure that the home team wins this year. But if he really wants to seal the deal, he needs to treat the European invaders to breakfast each morning at Lynn’s Paradise Cafe.

Let’s face it, in Europe, breakfast usually amounts to a few chunks of leftover cheese, a slice of bread and, if you’re lucky, a sliver of cantaloupe. Lynn’s, on the other hand, has a well-deserved national reputation as a bastion of the great American breakfast, which means enormous platters piled high with ham, bacon, three-egg omelets, biscuits as big as Smart Cars, and sausage gravy specifically designed to keep a golfer from ever rotating his or her torso.

Trust me, turn a slender guy like Padraig Harrington loose every morning at Lynn’s, and by the end of the week he’ll be splitting his pants instead of his fairways.

For that matter, after Harrington spends a few mornings at Lynn’s, his vision may be hopelessly skewed as well. Seldom has a restaurant managed to cram as much zany, colorful weirdness within four walls as Lynn’s does. The bright, open-raftered room contains a sprawling collection of mix-and-match Formica tables and booths above which dangle paper lanterns, kites and enough kitschy weirdness to populate even the strangest American dream.

Foodwise, there are crunch cakes — pancakes the diameter of a good-sized tree ($8.95). They’re built of Kentucky-milled Weisenberger stone-ground cornmeal, whole-wheat flour and a generous dollop of house-made cinnamon granola. These are flapjacks so perfect that butter and syrup seem superfluous — except that butter and syrup are never truly superfluous.

For a world-class Kentucky breakfast, Lynn’s offers the Kentucky Farmhouse Scramble ($14.95), made with Kentucky country ham, Kenny’s Swiss Cheese and roasted red peppers — not to mention a sprinkling of fried onions and accompaniments like fried green tomatoes, buttermilk biscuits and sorghum butter.

Most of the breakfast menu is an ecstatic celebration of excess: BLT fries (home fries with bacon, spinach, tomato, cheese and sour cream), $9.50; a mammoth breakfast burrito filled with black bean chili, scrambled eggs and cheddar cheese, $10.25; boldly flavored omelets and scrambles filled with chorizo and peppers, wild mushrooms, bacon and cheddar, or artichoke hearts, onions and feta.

The platters are hefty, and so are the prices — breakfast at Lynn’s will set you back as much as dinner at some area restaurants. But the members of the kitchen staff earn their keep with careful attention to details — like a pair of poached eggs that arrived at the table on a busy Saturday morning just as specified — with the white wrapped like sheer gauze around the rich, runny yolk ($1.90).

My breakfast drink of choice is the spicy, scratch-made Bloody Mary ($8.95), but just to make sure Harrington and company are well-primed for the course, I recommend the Bourbon Ball Milkshake ($9.95), made with Woodford Reserve, vanilla ice cream and a garnish of walnuts and semi-sweet chocolate chips.

Breakfast is always available — and is always the real attraction at Lynn’s. But the dinner menu is pretty inviting as well. Comfort food classics like house-roasted turkey ($14.25) and nicely spiced meatloaf ($13.75) finished with a dollop of marinara are accompanied by sides (a choice of two) like tender cabbage braised with rosemary, cheese grits or saucy lima beans that will melt in your mouth.

The theme of abundance continues into the dinner menu, but get away from the classics and flavors tend to be a bit more hit-and-miss. A platter of gingersnap-crusted cod was fresh, moist, coated with a crisp batter and served with a delightful mustard-shallot-horseradish sauce and some smoky, salty, perfectly seasoned green beans — but I couldn’t detect even a faint hint of ginger.

A Brie-and-bacon-grilled chicken salad had bright, vibrant flavors that were surprisingly at odds with its presentation. Instead of a bright backdrop, the mixed greens had been plunked into a dark green bowl that gave them an undeservedly gloomy look.

On the other hand, I highly recommend starting a meal with the fried potato cakes ($7.95). The dozen or so crisp fritters — each about as big around as a golf ball — were flecked with scallions and perfect for dunking into a creamy dip made of roasted garlic and fresh Capriole goat cheese.

And for dessert, there is the Paradise brownie ($5.95), a warm, rich, nutty affair that arrives at the table accompanied by three scoops of ice cream (recently, cinnamon swirl).

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