'My Bloody Valentine 3D' review

Jaime King and Megan Boone (Credit: Michael Roberts/Lionsgate)

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Coal miner Harry Warden survives a tragic accident that leaves him in a coma for a year. When he finally wakes up, he proceeds to brutally slaughter 22 residents of the quiet town of Harmony before the cops manage to take him down. A decade later, the survivors of Warden’s massacre—including broody outsider Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), plucky grocery cashier Sarah (Jaime King) and philandering sheriff Axel (Kerr Smith)—begin to suspect the madman might not be dead after all.

The buzz: 3D has made a dramatic comeback in Hollywood, thanks to new improved digital technology, and it was only a matter of time before the horror genre took advantage of it. “Valentine”—a remake of a 1981 Canadian cheapie that Quentin Tarantino has declared his favorite slasher movie of all time—is first up, but it won’t be the last.

The verdict: If you’re expecting lots and lots of extreme gore—we’re talking chests torn open, bodies sliced in half, a heart in a box of chocolates, and quite a few pickaxes directly to the head—you won’t be disappointed. If you’re expecting to dodge sharp objects flying in your face and blood spurting from the screen thanks to the extra dimension, well, the new 3D is a little more subtle than that. Even so, the technology is clearly the main draw and “Valentine” benefits from the novelty value of seeing an extra layer of visual depth added to a story that’s basic slasher trash. Director Patrick Lussier (a longtime collaborator of Wes Craven’s who edited all three “Scream” movies) does manage to ratchet the suspense up a notch beyond simple gimmicks, and the three main actors invest in their characters enough to flesh out all sides of a classic love triangle.

Did you know? Co-writer Todd Farmer also takes a small role on screen as an ill-fated truck driver who pretty much has sex and gets killed. Pay attention to the end credits for a shout out to his wife, who’s thanked for letting her husband get naked.

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